Spiritual Beauty

A few years ago, some ladies and I put together a retreat for a group of High School girls.  The topic was beauty.  Over the course of the weekend, we had breakout sessions on how to be beautiful as daughters of the King.  My topic for breakout sessions was "Spiritual Beauty," and I think I was more blessed by my study than the girls to whom I spoke during the sessions. 

In my personal Bible study and preparation for the weekend, I came across Psalm 139.  Until this time in my life, this was one of those psalms that I had read...but I had not really focused on.  Yes, there were key verses (vs.13-14, in particular) that I had always liked and remembered, but I had not really meditated on the psalm as a whole. Until now.  As I sat and spoke with small groups of some of the most beautiful (inside and out) girls you will ever meet, tears came to my eyes.  There we were sitting out on the deck of a beautiful lodge surrounded by God's creation talking about beauty.  I tried to give examples of women in my life who were and are spiritually beautiful.  

* Women like Mrs. Lisa Key: a wife, mother, teacher, daughter of our King.  I never had the opportunity to have Mrs. Key as a high school teacher due to transferring schools, but I was blessed to have her as a teacher at Horizons during the summers.  She was beautiful.  The world lost a beautiful person to cancer when she died, but I know she is in a huge mansion in Heaven with our Lord.  (I can make these same comments a few years later about Mrs. Hope Shull).

* Women like my sister, Rachel.  The first time my sister went to Haiti with my dad and me, she saw a need.  She postponed her senior year of college and moved to Haiti for a year to help our missionary there.  She has always been one of my heroes.  (I don't know if I have ever told her that.)

* Women like my mother who raised 5 children.  I have never met a more selfless, patient, kind and caring lady.  She has one of the most tender hearts and the love she has for our Lord is evident in every aspect of her life.  

(Since this time, I have added so many people to this list of amazing Christian examples. God has blessed my life in so many ways by the people He put in it!)

I had the girls give their examples of what Spiritual Beauty is, and we talked about what we could do in our lives to have this kind of spiritual beauty.  As we finished our discussion we read Psalm 139.  

There are many people who might think I'm crazy for using this psalm in a discussion about spiritual beauty, but I would like to ask you to read and meditate on this passage for a few minutes.  Pray this as a prayer.  Does it scare you that He knows your thoughts and words before you do (vs. 2-6)? Does it scare you that you can never escape His omnipresence (vs. 7-12)?  Does it bring alarm that He can search the innermost feelings and thoughts of your heart?  Or, does it bring peace.  As Christians, we should strive for such a strong spiritual beauty.  We should strive for such a pure heart that allows us to pray this prayer and genuinely mean it.  We should strive for a heart that can pray this prayer with an earnest longing for God to lead us closer to Him.

I believe when I can do that, I will be one step closer to being spiritually beautiful!

Psalm 139

English Standard Version (ESV)

Search Me, O God, and Know My Heart

To the choirmaster. A Psalm of David.

139 O Lord, you have searched me and known me!
² You know when I sit down and when I rise up;
    you discern my thoughts from afar.
³ You search out my path and my lying down
    and are acquainted with all my ways.
⁴ Even before a word is on my tongue,
    behold, O Lord, you know it altogether.
⁵ You hem me in, behind and before,
    and lay your hand upon me.
⁶ Such knowledge is too wonderful for me;
    it is high; I cannot attain it.

⁷ Where shall I go from your Spirit?
    Or where shall I flee from your presence?
⁸ If I ascend to heaven, you are there!
    If I make my bed in Sheol, you are there!
⁹ If I take the wings of the morning
    and dwell in the uttermost parts of the sea,
¹⁰ even there your hand shall lead me,
    and your right hand shall hold me.
¹¹ If I say, “Surely the darkness shall cover me,
    and the light about me be night,”
¹² even the darkness is not dark to you;
    the night is bright as the day,
    for darkness is as light with you.

¹³ For you formed my inward parts;
    you knitted me together in my mother's womb.
¹⁴ I praise you, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made.^[a]
Wonderful are your works;
    my soul knows it very well.
¹⁵ My frame was not hidden from you,
when I was being made in secret,
    intricately woven in the depths of the earth.
¹⁶ Your eyes saw my unformed substance;
in your book were written, every one of them,
    the days that were formed for me,
    when as yet there was none of them.

¹⁷ How precious to me are your thoughts, O God!
    How vast is the sum of them!
¹⁸ If I would count them, they are more than the sand.
    I awake, and I am still with you.

¹⁹ Oh that you would slay the wicked, O God!
    O men of blood, depart from me!
²⁰ They speak against you with malicious intent;
    your enemies take your name in vain.^[b]
21 Do I not hate those who hate you, O Lord?
    And do I not loathe those who rise up against you?
²² I hate them with complete hatred;
    I count them my enemies.

²³ Search me, O God, and know my heart!
    Try me and know my thoughts!^[c]
24 And see if there be any grievous way in me,
    and lead me in the way everlasting!^[d]

"I'm sorry...I have to go to church tomorrow..."

Have you ever been invited to an event and found yourself declining the invitation in this way?  

Unfortunately, if we are honest, many of us would say we have.  Maybe, we used this "excuse" when we were in junior  high or high school and we were still in that, "My Parents Make Me Go to Church" phase.  Maybe, it was when we were in college and knew we needed to go attend worship with our brethren, but not yet were we fully appreciative of this time or fully convinced this time was very much needed in our lives.  

How do you feel about that statement now?

Growing up, I heard preachers and Bible class teachers talk about how I needed to change my attitude from "I have to..." to "I get to..." or, even better, "I am blessed to..."  At some point in my adolescence, I grasped the more positive attitude, and I really felt blessed to be able to worship with my family.  Eventually, attending worship became more of a habit.  I remember a time not long after graduating college that my spiritual life really suffered because of this.  I was living on my own, teaching school, and worshiping with an incredible church family.  I was teaching the 4-5 year old Sunday school class and a Wednesday night huddle group with some teenage girls.  Sounds great right?  The problem was with all that was going on, I felt alone and lost.  My attitude wasn't what it should have been.  I attended worship because it was expected of me.  Don't me wrong.  I LOVED teaching the Bible classes.  I have to admit, however, that there were some Sunday mornings where I would have been quite tempted to sleep in had I not had the responsibility of teaching.  Thank God for the opportunity I had to teach precious 4-5 year olds, because it kept me going!  One Sunday morning, I was especially in a low spot, I planned on going to worship, teaching, and ducking out before I could really be noticed.  A sweet friend of mine caught me and really encouraged me to attend our weekly lunch and small group Bible study.  Reluctantly, I went with her.  By the end of the small group Bible study, I was sitting there with tears streaming down my face!  What we discussed and studied from God's word was EXACTLY what I needed that day!  I had not been speaking the words "I have to go...," but I had been living those words.  I had become very lukewarm in my walk with God.  Shame on me!  

Have you ever felt this way?  I pray that you haven't.  The reality, though, is that many of you probably have.  If you are there now, I urge you to reach out to someone with whom you can be open and honest.  Someone with whom you can share your burdens(Galatians 6:2) and who will pray for you.  Pray that God will prick your heart and help you to see the importance and necessity of worshipping Him.  Pray that God will guide you back to Him before it is too late. 

This past Sunday morning, I was blessed to be able to attend worship with my family for the first time as a family of three.  I was blessed to be able to attend worship with my husband for only the second time in 7 months!  This had been a true case of forgetting how blessed you are until it is gone.  For months I have kissed my husband goodbye as he left for worship each week.  For months, we have been praying that Flu season would quickly make its exit so that Harper would be able to attend worship with us.  When we received the "green light" from our daughter's doctor on the Thursday before, I was giddy with excitement!  This whole week since Easter Sunday, my attitude has been completely different.  I have been happier; I have been more energetic; I have been excited.  Several times today I have found myself talking to Harper about what we needed to do before tomorrow (bath, early bedtime, etc.) because we get to go to church again tomorrow! What a BLESSING!!

There is a reason God commanded us to assemble together on the first day of every week.  He, in His infinite wisdom, knew we would need a reminder of His love and sacrifice at the beginning of every week.  He knew we needed to start every week with Him at the forefront.  He knew we would need the encouragement and time of fellowship with our brothers and sisters.  We are commanded to worship Him, yes.  This is not something for which we should be sorry!  On the contrary, because we are Christians, we are BLESSED with the opportunity to worship Him!  What an incredible privilege!  

As we face the beginning of another week, it is my prayer that we approach worship with an attitude of thanksgiving and humility.  It is my prayer that we put away the feeling of obligation and the apathetic motions.  It is my prayer that we stop apologizing for following our Father's command to assemble with other Christians to praise His name.  The gathering together of the saints is a weekly celebration of the Lord's sacrifice for us.  It is a weekly reminder of His unending love for us.  It is my prayer that we regularly thank God for blessing us with the opportunities He places in our lives:  opportunities to study His word, opportunities to fellowship with brethren, opportunities to grow, opportunities to worship Him. 

My Sundays and Wednesday evenings are booked from here on out.  I will not apologize or make excuses.  I will praise the Lord...I AM BLESSED!